challenge

First things first, the results of last month:

I failed. It’s terrible for me to use that word– it’s too judgmental!– and quite a dramatic thing to say for something intended to be “simple”, but really, it’s even more fitting to use the word because of the supposed “simplicity.” I didn’t get everything done, hell, I didn’t really get much done at all. And it’s bothering me so much. Or rather, I’m making it a much bigger deal then it actually is. Let’s review:

1. Finish three books. I finished one book, Born of Night. As I went to continue A Feast for Crows, I realized it had been so long since I started it, that I began again from page one. -_- I’m already past the point I stopped, but I still have a little less than halfway to go.
2. Walk 10,000 steps each day. Well, I included a television marathon as goal, so it’s no surprise which one was easier to prioritize. There were a few days (okay, there were two), I reached that number, but mostly I just let myself loaf around.
3. Meditate everyday. Now this was much easier, as I chose to meditate first thing after I woke up. Admittedly, my monkey mind was constantly in full swing (ha), but I got a little bit better at quelling that. And I’m still working on it.
4. Catch up on Breaking Bad. (Of course I completed the television one. It’s me.) So. Many. Emotions. Despite the toll it took on my health– in more ways than one– I’m glad I was able to catch the last two episodes live. Did you see the finale? Such a satisfying ending.
5. Finish knitting my Brooklyn Tweed Stranger cardigan. Yeah. My other sweaters still hold up, I’ll live.

Now, what did I learn? While public accountability helps, (although- and I’m grateful for this– no one guilted reminded me) visibility is even better. After writing up my list, I honestly didn’t really look at it. As you can tell, I’ve decided to keep going with monthly goals, but this time, I’m going to make an effort to remind myself daily and directly… as one should do with goals.

Which is the other matter: “should.” I’ve an affinity for self-help/productivity books and blogs, which have taught me the danger of using that word. Psychology Today teaches that too:

Known as “categorical imperatives,” shoulds, oughts and musts create anger and guilt. “You should have done X and not Y!” “He should have known better!” are expressions of anger. “I shouldn’t have said that!” “I should have done XYZ!” are statements of guilt.

You know the cycle, guilt leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to… anger?* You get what I’m saying.

But I digress. Although I didn’t accomplish what I set out to do, I blogged quite a bit, saw the release of one of my best friend’s blog (which I got to designed!), dabbled in typography, and I finally wrote a new song, which I have yet to record.

I didn’t completely waste September.

Now, for October I’ve only got two goals:

1. Launch Project A.
2. Work on Project B to prepare for launch in November.

Yes, they’re not really simple, nor are they specific (at least not outwardly), but I need them to be nameless because they terrify me the surprise is the best part!

This is not to say that I’ve put my health, my literacy, or even my sweater on hold, rather, it’s those two projects that I want to focus here, online.

What are your October goals?

*Name the quote! And the quote that one that’s quoting!

All your favorite productivity books and blogs are correct, public accountability gets stuff done.

1. Finish three books. I’m a book behind on my Goodreads goal, which I’ve already set at two books per month. Gotta get to it! So, what books am I planning to finish?
   1. Born of Night by Sherrilyn Kenyon.
   2. A Feast for Crows by George R. R. Martin.
   3. ??? It’ll likely be the Vaginal Fantasy pick of the month, but I’ve yet to check it out, so we’ll see.
2. Walk 10,000 steps each day. I can’t believe it’s already September and it’s so bizarre not being in classes on the weekdays! Beyond the sheer mindf*ck, physically it’s strange, especially since my homebody default mode has kept me from getting out and about. When I was in school, I had about an hour and a half commute, which entailed walking to bus stops, taking the train, and then walking from shuttle stops to my classes in the back of campus (of course). It was a sprawling campus, so I was able to get in more than the daily recommended number of steps. Now? Not so much. If you’re wondering how I’m going to keep track of this, I’ve had a Fitbit for about a year and a half, and it’s been making me feel guilty all summer! In the best way.
3. Meditate everyday. There was a time a few years ago when I was diligent about this and could meditate for at least half an hour. Lately, I can’t last three minutes without getting antsy! But the value is all in the process, right?
4. Catch up on Breaking Bad. I’m currently in the middle of season three, but I’m hoping to catch up right before the series finale, so I can watch that live.
5. Finish knitting my Brooklyn Tweed Stranger cardigan. Operative word being “knitting.” If I don’t finish the seaming… well, hopefully it won’t be that cold in early October.

What are some of your goals for the month?